I a big brover

Translation: Nicholas is going to be a big brother.

Sometime in mid-July we'll welcome our second child. I didn't intend for my children to be nearly 4 years apart, but back surgery will cause a person to take a little time off from pregnancy. Parenting a toddler boy will cause this delay as well, I believe. I am quite sure Nicholas doesn't yet understand what it means to be a big brother. I know his world will be turned upside down for a bit, but I know in time they will become pals. I eventually accepted and even enjoyed my younger sister. Sure, I was in my mid-twenties, but I came around.

I've heard many mothers expecting their second children speak of worries about being able to love another baby as much as they love their first. Worrying that the older child will resent the new addition. Concern over dividing their time so that the eldest doesn't feel slighted.

Um, those are not my worries. I know there will be sibling rivalry, and I'm pretty certain my heart has already begun to grow large enough to love another child. Nicholas will adjust, he's one cool kid. Here are my pressing concerns: I wonder how I am going to find time to cover up my adult acne and get my frizz ball hair blown straight while caring for two children in the mornings.

This picture looks just like my mother in her twenties-it's eerie.

Does that sound awful? Seriously, if I have to wear a fluffy ponytail and sport a bedraggled, makeupless face for months one end, I will lose it. Wearing the same two spit up stained sweat suits for months and months last time was bad enough, but since I only had the one child, I at least had time to slap on some mascara and lipstick on a fairly regular basis. It didn't do much to cover up the dark circles under my eyes, but it made me feel better when I looked in the mirror. Do you think I could teach Nicholas to wield a round brush and hair dryer while I nurse the baby?

I have learned so much since I became a mother in 2006. I didn't know what I was in for, and so I really didn't enjoy pregnancy and planning for the baby's arrival all that much. The fact that we were barely holding our heads above water due to the mortgage we took on at that time played a role as well. Argh. Luckily, we aren't destitute this time around, so I'm already squirreling away baby items here and there, and looking forward to finding out the sex of this baby.

I am 90% sure Scott is going to cave in and want to find out this time. I am dying to know. Being surprised on the big day last time was great, but I'm itching to create a more gender specific nursery. The urge to 'nest' is hitting early and hard. I do not want to bring this kiddo home from the hospital in green and yellow.

That is all for now. I'm off to look for matching mommy and baby outfits online. Totally kidding. I think.